Need to Spell It Backwards…

You might have run into this situation. You suspect that an idea of yours is a bit odd, that if others knew what you were thinking they’d look at you sideways?

It’s happened to me more than a few times, and the result is always the same. I’m not alone. Others have self-doubt, odd habits, quirks. It’s only by sharing these thoughts with people whom I trust do I realize that the thought is not so unusual after all.

Case in point.

I live under very challenging circumstances, there’s little argument about that. And it’s not getting any easier in many ways, except for the fact that the net of support around me tightens as each day passes. I’m so darned lucky in that respect that it blows me away.

However, after a long period of time over the last two years during which I felt I hardly stopped crying long enough to catch a breath of air, nowadays I can find it difficult to shed tears for myself and my situation. Yet once in awhile I need a really good cry to release whatever sadness and frustration is inside of me.

Enter “Cry NROP” (I’ve intentionally spelled the second word backwards, I have no desire to have internet web crawlers bombarding me with spam with content of a nature inappropriate to this blog).

What the heck is cry nrop? It’s a movie I’ll put on so that I can cry over someone else’s troubles, in turn letting me get out the tears that can get trapped inside.

I had a good laugh this week with a few friends over this subversive use of a sad movie, only to hear that others too sometimes find it difficult to get a good cry started and have used or recommended this tactic themselves.

Cry nrop. The one that got me going most recently? '”Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close”. I sobbed my heart out, and at some point I realized that I was letting myself cry for me. And that’s okay once in awhile.