Will I Be Asleep Before I Finish This Post?

Tonight is the first night trying out another new drug, this time it's Pregabalin. Typically used for the nerve pain of Fibromyalgia and Multiple Sclerosis - the hope is that some of my pain is caused by pressure exerted on the nerves by the tumours and not necessarily 100% coming from within the bones directly. Although it's not "on label" for ECD, the insurance covered the majority of the cost thankfully. But those deductibles are killing me on my extremely tight budget!

As an added bonus I'm told that this drug may make me feel quite drowsy and I might have a better chance of sleeping through the pain that always wakes me up a few times each night. The friend whom I was lucky to have join me in that particular doctor's appointment shared in my excitement at that prospect knowing how difficult my nights can be (we take our "high-fives" where we can get them!) Sometimes I'm lucky enough to drift back to sleep after a bit of meditation (or pain medication depending on how bad it gets), other times it's game over for the night and I have that unnerving time between 2-5 am to contend with when I feel more alone that at any other hours of the day or night.

There's always a wee bit of nervousness trying out a new med, I have a talent for having some odd side effects. Being alone and trying new drugs makes me even more ill at ease. No one to check on me, to make sure I'm okay, to hold my hand when the side effects are uncomfortable or disconcerting.

I'm still awake. I was really hoping that I'd fall asleep in the middle of typing this post  but no such luck.

Still here...playing Words With Friends.

Still here...playing soothing music.

Still here...thinking lovely thoughts about my beautiful daughter who turned nineteen today.

Still here...but getting too tired to worry about the fact that my right leg has gone numb.

Still here...barely...

Asleep now :-) Keeping my fingers crossed that I don't wake up for at least four or five hours. What's it come to when that's the best possible gift I can think of at this moment?